Amas-Veritas.com

Today's Date: Monday, February 23, 2009 (7:09am).

Alias: Bela

Age: 27

Birthdate: January 6, 1982, Capricorn

Current Location: La Crescenta, CA (about 45 minutes north of Los Angeles)

Occupation: IT Director - **********-******* & Associates Insurance Services, Inc. Unfortunately this involves two or so hours of data entry, opening mail, answering phones as necessary, and filing. Otherwise, I am designing their website, managing their databases and software, and overall trying to help them save money ;-) I try to stay out of the actual insurance part as much as possible. I bought books for the MCAD/MCSD tests but with working at home on their website and then trying despirately to find time for my own, that is being put aside for the short time being. I hope to then go on to the MCTS and MCPD certifications. MCSE was just too boring, no creative aspect to it. I'd like to be able to use my developer skills to continue on to PHP and MySQL certifictions for a steady job and be able to develop and sell applications on the side. I hate being employed. I would very much prefer to employ myself.

General Diagnosis off the top of my head: Major Depressive Disorder, Anorexia Nervosa, Self-Mutilative Behaviors (cutting, etc.), PTSD, Social Phobia, OCD, BDD.

Physically: LOTS of scars from cutting myself with scissors, knives, (mainly) a razor blade, or my nails (the one thing they can't take from me), though I'm only cutting about once every six months at this point. I experience side-effects from not eating enough, taking too many diet or caffeine pills, severe anxiety, nightmares and flashbacks, and insomnia. It's fun being me :-D

Current Meds: Lexapro is still at 40mg and Provigil (?mg), and various other things I take for the hell of it: tons of Alive! Multivitamins and other things depending on what I have available (e.g. diet pills...). Oh and Depo Provera...don't ask me about side effects, I haven't been on it a week yet.

Current Reads: Various programming books, The Natural Order of Things by Antonio Lobo Antunes (sp?) for the 2nd or 3rd time, The Black Hole Wars by (?) Susskind, and Caesar Milan's book about training dogs...I forget what it's called, and many different magazines at a time: "The New Yorker", "The American Scholar", "Time", "TechNet", "Information Week" and the "Times Literary Supplement" (I think it's the "London Times" but can't say for sure). I never actually finish one before the next arrives in the mail.

Next pick: The Tales of Beedle the Bard by J.K. Rowling...eventually.

Hospitalizations: April 19, 2001 to May 7, 2001 and May 24, 2002 to June 3, 2002. Partial Hospitalization June 10, 2002 to December 24, 2002 (yes, on Christmas Eve one lady told me I wasn't telling them enough "secrets" so to speak and I told them all to go to Hell (not really)). Total days inpatient: 29, Total days partial @ LEH: 142, Total days partial @ BHC Alhambra: 8.125. Nothing since THANK GOD.